I have been wanting to start writing this blog for ages. For months on end, I have been trying to figure out what it is that I want to write about, how to find my ideal audience, what to focus on, how to create value, how to come up with a big vision. You know, all those things, any marketing expert will advise you to do. A lot of beautiful insights have come to me in this process, and yet it has also been utterly exhausting. So many times, I have reached a place of frustration, despair and collapse. That grand vision just wasn’t coming, no matter how hard I pushed. And so I wasn’t writing anything and kept hoping for a resolution.
And you know what? Today, I have taken a different choice. Of taking action, despite having no clarity. No, my vision is not quite there yet. Pushing hasn’t brought me anywhere. I don’t really know who these words are meant for and how what they will create value. And yet… There is something huge that I have realised. A lot more potent than a particular vision. And this is something that can be a “make it or break it” in terms of anything you approach in your life. It can give you wings and help you rise above your doubts.
This magical something is an INTENTION. An intention, that emerges from within, from an impulse or itch that just won’t go away and leave you at peace. Now that I am feeling into it, it feels like a fire burning in my gut, like a joyful expansion in my heart, like a force that is so much stronger than any plan my mind could ever come up with. It feels like something that wants to have an expression in the world and holds so much more truth than my fears and doubts about whether it’s worth doing, where it is going to go and what other people will think. So I am making a choice to surrender to it and see what adventure it will take me on! And yes, it has taken me THAT long to remember how powerful the intention is - and I trust that that was exactly the time that it took for the seeds I will mention in the end of this post to organically grow and reach the surface.
But what is this intention? With all my heart, I want this space to serve. I want it to be in service of the expansion of myself, as I am choosing to step into my authority and self-expression. I also want it to be in the highest service to all those who will happen to read it. I want it to be a channel for healing, transformation, empowerment and inspiration. Alongside this intention, I feel a commitment to be transmitting a certain kind of energy here. I don’t know if “vibration talk” may sound too woo-woo for you, but I will use it because I do believe that all of our experiences are vibrational and energetic in nature. So I want to use this space to transmit the vibes of courage, hope, faith and deep compassion for all aspects of our - often crazy and amazing in equal amounts! - human experience on this earth.
I don’t yet know what form this transmission will take. It may be through sharing stories of my heroine’s journey and challenges I face (some of them I set up for myself!), it may be through sharing inspirational stories of people that I encounter, it may be through sharing insights, practices, tools and wisdom that I keep picking up on my path, it may be through sharing inspiration and resources that make my light brighter with a hope that it will help yours to shine brighter too. We shall see!
I cherish that space of not knowing. In Gestalt philosophy, which is a major influence on my thinking, it is called “the fertile void” - the space, where “the surprise is possible” and where the potential for growth is infinite. I can choose it to see this place as scary and try to control or avoid it. I can also choose to see it as exciting and trust the wisdom that is there without having to understand it - it is a conscious choice, based on FAITH.
My choice is to be in faith and see every experience of life as an opportunity to enter that space of the unknown, the space of organic being. Organic, because it emerges of its own accord, from the depths of one’s being and it’s movement feels easy, graceful and effortless. It is the movement of children, of plants and animals, of the seasons and moon cycles. It’s the movement of life itself. And I believe that the only thing that is required of us it to be present with this movement that happens within, to trust it and allow it its flow without blocking it. I read this phrase on someone’s Instagram today: “it isn’t easy, but it is simple” - and I agree with it. Being able to access the space of organic being takes lifelong commitment and practice. So let this blog post be the first expression of this organic being that wants to come to the surface of life and give its gifts to the world.
And I also have something to offer you. If you chose to read this post, it is clearly because you are also on some level hearing a call from your own being, whether you are conscious of it or not. And so, I invite you to create some space (at least a few moments of quiet, undisturbed contemplation) and feel what impulses and urges you might become aware of. What is it that you desire? What is it that is calling you? What is it that is exciting you (and sometimes it can even manifest as an irritation!)? If nothing comes up, I tell you in advance that it’s absolutely fine. By no means, are you supposed to know the answers to those questions. It’s enough to just sow the seeds of inquiry and surrender the rest to life itself. It is your presence to yourself that matters. The seeds will give fruits in their own time.